To thine own self be true

We all have those moments in our lives that are pivotal to determining what comes next.  I have tended to look at life like a choose-your-own-adventure book.  You know, the kind that you get to a point in the story and you get to choose to go to page 48 or 152 to keep reading what happens next, based on your choice.  As my loving Dr. Who would say, they are time-locked or something that could never be changed or stopped from happening.   

I've had a couple of these in my lifetime so far.  A memorable one was coming out in 1994 on Thanksgiving to my mother that I was *gasp* a homosexual (say that in your best Beverly Leslie).  A calculated move since I was going back to college that night and didn't have to experience the fall-out, but still once you say something like that you really can't take it back.  In my case anyways.  I never really say something unless I mean it, sans mind-altering substances of course. Those were the days that you wore chains with rainbow colored rings on them.  My father made fun of them on a visit to his house once and called them something I can't repeat and I came out to him as well.  Neither were fun, but that's the nutshell version. There should have been years of therapy there, but what's the point.

What's really the kicker here is that coming out as a friend of Dorothy was nothing compared to the anxiety around coming out as a tarot reader.  Of all things.  Who knew there could be something higher on some people's list of things to stay away from.

But people are afraid of things they don't understand.  They put stigma on things so other people won't like it so they have something in common to stand against.  Its human nature.  However, its a rule of thumb for me not to associate with people who have a list of things you have to be in order to be accepted.  I'm happy on the outside and not being a joiner.  Not having a list of what someone needs to be makes it a lot easier to meet new and interesting people.  That's what life is for isn't it; to have as many experiences as you can so you can report back to the mothership (insert your version of a higher power here) everything you learned?  

I embraced tarot reading as a tool for divination.  There are many tools.  If you're reading my Esoterics section of my journal you'll see there is plenty to choose from.  I picked up on tarot because I am able to use the images and symbols on the cards to divine messages for my clients.  The book that comes with the deck is fine, but at the end of the day its the pictures that inspire the right words to say at the time.  For the most part I'd say I'm pretty good, I've only had two clients that I just couldn't connect with to do a reading.  Why sit down for a reading when your belief system isn't ready for it. 

This part of my world was really hard for me to grab onto at first.  I am a scientist by trade, so my "left" brain wanted evidence and data to support what my "right" brain was getting from the cards.  But as my experience grew it was easy to satisfy both sides with the feedback I get from my clients.  The many "how did you know that" comments and people who come back months later and tell me that what I said would happen did happen because they didn't change course.  Its amazing and something I have a lot of gratitude for being able to help people like that.  

But really I attribute it to what spirit/creator/etc. inspires me to say at that given moment in time.  Specifically what part of the card to look at to know what to say.  It relies on how I interpret the card to give the reading they need and who to send to me to read for.  Its all divinely directed and I'm happy to do my part with this gift.  

So, tarot readers unite! (you don't know how many times I spelled that "untie" and it looked right)

I do offer a tarot share at our store once a month and we're looking at doing it online so more can participate.  If you're interested, go to the menu on this page and look for Tarot Share under Divination Services.  It will give you all the details.    

So the moral of the story here is just to be your true authentic self.  The people you resonate with will come to you to form a community of people you can call your own.  Just believe in yourself first.  The moment you feel you have to live up to someone's expectations to socialize, that's your red flag to get out. 

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